Book No. 40 – My Horizontal Life

4 Apr

Book number 40 is called My Horizontal Life by Chelsea Handler. I am such a huge Chelsea Handler fan, she is just a goddess in my eyes and a true comedic genius. This book is basically a testament to her young and crazy days. It’s a book that will leave you completely shocked, utterly disgusted, and laughing hysterically all within minutes. Although, in this book about Chelsea Handlers young and reckless days, she appears to be an alcoholic who is a borderline sex addict, you can’t help but laugh with her and love her all the same. She goes in to great detail about all of her failed relationships, trying to make a living for herself in California, her family and the way they view her, drugs, alcohol, and friendship. This book has everything from Chelsea hiring a stripper/prostitute to de-virgenize her annoying roommate to Chelsea having a one night stand with a guy whose dog eats her poop stained underwear!

Aside from all the laughing, this book made me think back to my teen years and all the amazing, fun, and sometimes reckless memories I have been fortunate enough to have made. All the moments in which I truly felt alive. All those memories that I can look back on and say, in that moment, I swear, I was infinite. Because isn’t that what life is really about? The moments. The memories. The feeling of being infinite and knowing that you are truly, alive. Even though Chelsea has done some unspeakable and grotesque things – she has lived. The same can’t be said for many of the rest of us.

There have been times in the past where I got way too drunk. Where I lied to someone that trusted me. Where I betrayed someone I called a friend. Where I hurt somebody that I loved. Where I got in trouble with the law. Where I did something illegal. But all of those things have become a part of me, a part of who I am. I live my life with one motto. That is, NO REGRETS. There are no mistakes in this life. No right and wrong. No absolutes. There are only choices. And once they are made, we learn to live with them.

I want to share this song with you all, because I think it is not only beautiful, but it also gives you a perspective on life.


In case you can’t listen, here are the lyrics.

Shadows settle on the place, that you left.
Our minds are troubled by the emptiness.
Destroy the middle, it’s a waste of time.
From the perfect start to the finish line.

And if you’re still breathing, you’re the lucky ones.
‘Cause most of us are heaving through corrupted lungs.
Setting fire to our insides for fun
collecting names of the lovers that went wrong
the lovers that went wrong.

We are the reckless,
we are the wild youth
chasing visions of our futures
one day we’ll reveal the truth
that one will die before he gets there.

And if you’re still bleeding, you’re the lucky ones.
‘Cause most of our feelings, they are dead and they are gone.
We’re setting fire to our insides for fun.
Collecting pictures from the flood that wrecked our home,
It was a flood that wrecked this…

…and you caused it…
…and you caused it…
…and you caused it…

Well I’ve lost it all, I’m just a silhouette,
A lifeless face that you’ll soon forget,
My eyes are damp from the words you left,
ringing in my head, when you broke my chest.
ringing in my head, when you broke my chest.

And if you’re in love, then you are the lucky one,
’cause most of us are bitter over someone.
Setting fire to our insides for fun,
to distract our hearts from ever missing them.
but I’m forever missing him.

and you caused it,
and you caused it,
and you caused it.

The pain, the heartache, it’s all worth it. It means you are a live. And that is a beautiful thing to be.
Taylor Jordan

One Response to “Book No. 40 – My Horizontal Life”

  1. seo April 24, 2012 at 6:38 am #

    You really make it seem so easy with your presentation but I find this topic to be actually something which I think I would never understand. It seems too complicated and extremely broad for me. I’m looking forward for your next post, I’ll try to get the hang of it!

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